BS”D
PERSISTENT
PRATTLE: SIACH SIFSOTEINU – YOM KIPPUR
Shira Smiles shiur
2019/5780
Adapted by Channie
Koplowitz Stein
One
of the sins we ask atonement for during the Viduy/Confession prayer of
Yom Kippur is the sin of siach sifsoteinu/idle chatter of our lips.
ArtScroll explains that our lips sin not only when we pray or study Torah
without concentration, but very often when we are uncomfortable with silence
and fill the void with aimless chatter.
Before
exploring this sin in greater depth and resolving to improve, it may be
worthwhile to understand the two different kinds of kabbalot/resolutions
one may accept upon himself. Rav Salanter explains that often one resolves to
act in a new way following a tragedy, perhaps to memorialize a death so one can
remain inspired by the awareness of the tragedy. Or, one can be moved to accept
a stringency as an act of teshuvah, to help with the resolution not to sin this
way in the future. In this scenario, Rav Salanter explains, there are multiple
layers and components to every sin. In this context, he suggests we pick one aspect
of the sin to concentrate on rather than the whole sin. With small steps we are
more likely to succeed in eventually eradicating our propensity for this sin.
Rav
Meislish explains the sin of siach sifsoteinu in terms related to
prayer. During tefillah, our hearts and minds should be focused on our
connecting with Hakodosh Boruch Hu through the words our lips are pronouncing.
If our minds and hearts are elsewhere while our lips are mouthing the words, we
have transgressed and degraded the holy words of the prayer. This is equally
true when we are making a brachah or answering Amen to someone
else’s blessing.
In
Heorat Derech, Rabbi Weissblum observes that there are different words
for speech in the Hebrew language, each with a different connotation. Thoughtful,
articulated speech is called dibur. [Think of the Ten Devarim/Commandments.
CKS] Thoughtless speech, prattle, on the other hand, is referred to as siach,
analogous to siach hasadeh, the wild, untended shrubbery, like
tumbleweed in the desert. This can refer to both thoughtless conversation or
thoughtless prayer.
Certainly
we are meant to speak for all practical purposes, for business or food
preparation or childcare, for example, but our words in most other
circumstances should be measured. After all, the medrash claims that we each
are given an allotted number of words to speak in our lifetime. But beyond
this, from the Steipler Rebbe to the Vilna Gaon we are told of the great reward
for reining in one’s speech. By refraining from speaking or even for pausing
momentarily to reconsider before speaking, one merits the primal, hidden light
of creation. Is it not advantageous to work on at least one aspect of our
speech as part of our teshuvah process?
One
of the best known verses in Ashrei is, “Poteach et yadcha umasbia
lechol chai ratzon/You open Your hand and satisfy the desire of every
living thing.” In Tiv Hatorah, Rabbi Gamliel Rabinowitz gives an
alternate interpretation of this verse. Hashem opens His hand and instills in
each person the ability to desire. Will we use that desire to seek a closer
relationship with Hakodosh Boruch Hu? The choice is ours, especially now during
aseret yemai teshuvah.
In
its simple meaning, however, the verse refers to Hashem’s providing sustenance
for every living thing, an interpretation echoed in Birkat Hamazon.
Nevertheless, the terminology begs further explanation. Rabbi Schwab on
Prayer explains that indeed the verse refers to Hashem’s providing the
livelihood of each individual. But whether or not one is successful in what one
does is determined by how others view him. Hashem provides each individual with
the ability to be desired or not desired by others, to be liked or not liked.
An applicant may ace any job interview, whether as a plumber or as a professor,
and not get the job if the interviewer doesn’t like him. A merchant or salesman
will be unsuccessful unless his customers view him favorably. This ability to
find favor with others, this ratzon, is what Hashem Himself provides or
withholds from each individual. In this way, a person’s livelihood comes
directly from Hashem whereas redemption and salvation can come through an
angel.
It
is for this reason that our rabbis have decreed that if you did not have the
proper intention when mouthing these words, you must repeat the verse. If you
finished the passage, since the entire chapter is written in the order of the aleph
bet, you must repeat everything that follows that verse as well. Why is
this so? Rabbi Schwab notes that the orderly progression of the verses in aleph
bet represents the human input, logic, honesty and integrity, while the
verse itself proclaims full faith that Hashem is the sole Provider of one’s
livelihood.
In
a similar vein, responding Amen to a blessing carries the same weight
and must be said with full kavanah/intention. Rabbi Wolbe explains that Amen
incorporates within it the three basic tenets of Judaism. The three Hebrew
letters of the AMeN are an acronym for (A/E)Kel
Melech Ne’eman. Kel signifies that Hashem created the
world; Melech proclaims our coronating Him as our King when we accepted
the Torah; Ne’eman validates our belief that He is faithful to redeem us
in the future. Therefore, continues Rabbi Wolbe citing Reish Lakish, he who
answers Amen with all his strength is assured that the gates of Gan Eden
will be opened for him.
Every
word of our prayers has unimaginable depths of meaning. If we take the first brachah
of Shemoneh Esreai, as does Rabbi Jaeger, we would find that each phrase
and each word brings us closer to a love of Hakodosh Boruch Hu, both through
our ancestry and through a personal relationship. Rabbi Kaplan explains this
beautifully in his interpretation of the last four words before the conclusion
of the brachah that describe this relationship. First, Hashem is our Melech/King,
One distant and almost unapproachable. Then He is our Ozer/Helper, a
Friend we can call on in difficult circumstances. Then He is our Moshia/Savior,
One Who sees our plight and jumps in to save us even when there is no time to
call directly to Him. Finally, He is our Shield, surrounding us and protecting
us even when the danger is so sudden it may not even be discernible. He is
always in front and around us. Relating to these four words will transform the
quality of our prayers.
It
is with the understanding that we are standing before the King of kings that we
must enter into payer, writes Rabbi Frand. Before we begin, we need to focus
our thoughts on this awareness or, as the Ramban rules, we have not fulfilled
the obligation of prayer. The introductory phrase to the Shemoneh Esrai
is meant to bring us to that awareness as we open our lips to say words of praise
to Hakodosh Boruch Hu.
The
gravity of remaining focused during tefillah can perhaps best be exemplified by
the Shulchan Aruch’s warning that one who talks during Chazorat
HaShatz/Chazan’s Repetition has committed a sin too great to bear, writes
Rabbi Frand. Talking in God’s presence is totally disrespectful. Talking makes
a mockery of the ongoing prayer.
This
idea dates back to the horrendous era of the pogroms of Tach and Tat,
1648-1649 when the Cossacks rampaged and murdered perhaps hundreds of thousands
of Jews, writes Rabbi Solomon in With Hearts Full of Faith. The Gadol
Hador of that time, Rav Lippman Heller, known as the Tosefos Yom Tov,
had a dream that Hashem told him that these tragedies were allowed to go forth
because the people talked during Chazorat Hashatz. If the people made a
mockery of prayer in My house during good times, explained Hashem, why should I
listen to them when they call out to Me in distress? Talking in shul
neutralizes the most powerful tool we have in asking Hashem for mercy, kindness
and blessings.
Our
thoughts during our prayers, especially when we are in shul, should be focused
on Hashem. After all, we are in His house and have an appointment with Him,
writes Rabbi Frand. It is a struggle, especially for women, not to talk in
shul, acknowledges Rebbetzin Smiles. Women are often so busy with taking care
of family, often in addition to holding down jobs, that there is little time
for socializing during the week. However, one can create time after shul,
perhaps with a kiddush, to socialize. In shul, we must set an example of proper
decorum for our children.
Actually,
children often recite brachot with great sensitivity that adults often
lose, writes Rabbi Bodner. Do we remember to focus on the words, to understand
that Hashem continues to create the fruit or the bread that we are currently
enjoying? If Hashem would stop for an instant, all would cease to exist.
It
is undoubtedly too difficult to focus on the entire brachah. Choose one word,
perhaps atah/You. When we address Hashem, when we say “You,” we are
bringing His presence down, and we are standing before Him, writes the Aish
Kodesh. There are so many words in so many places of our tefillah that can
bring us closer to an awareness of Hakodosh Boruch Hu. Choose one, and make
your speech meaningful.
Shabbat
presents an additional challenge to being careful with our speech. When we are
not occupied with the mundane activities of the weekdays, it is easy to fall
into patterns of idle prattle. But Rabbi Gamliel Rabinowitz warns us that we
are not permitted to speak about or plan activities that are prohibited on
Shabbat.
In
Shabbos of Eternity, Rabbi Sutton cites our Rabbis who tell us that
although Man was created with the power of speech on Friday, and indeed spoke,
his power of holy, sanctified speech was created on Shabbat. On Shabbat, Hashem
had stopped His speech with which He had created the world as He endowed Man
with the power of speech to be in His image. Shabbat should be a day of
introspection when we limit our speech to lofty ideas. Therefore, of the seven Ushpizin
who “visit” our sukkah, the seventh, associated with the seventh day, Shabbat,
is David. It was David who elevated speech and wrote the Songs of Praise to
Hashem.
Shabbat
is time for family. Therefore, suggests Rabbi Mintzberg in Ben Melech,
we should plan on involving the family in elevated speech. Telling stories of
our great Rabbis or recounting medrashim on the parsha can bring joy to
the Shabbos table. Perhaps a more personal approach can be to go around the
table and ask each family member to recount a moment during the week when he
sensed hashgacha pratis, Hashem’s personal involvement in his life.
These are more often than not simple moments, but nevertheless one can find God
if one looks for Him. An adult can find a parking spot in front of the store. A
child can be grateful that an adult threw him the ball that rolled into the
gutter before the oncoming car would smash it. A student might be grateful that
the teacher called on him for the one answer he remembered. So many little
things to acknowledge Hashem’s presence in our daily lives.
Rebbetzin
Smiles offered an additional suggestion, one that may shed light on the inner
life of our family members. Perhaps ask each person whom they would like to
meet from among the biblical figures. One child in this scenario answered that
she would like to meet Aharon, older brother of Moshe, and ask him how he coped
with his younger brother getting all the attention.
God
gifted us with this most powerful tool, speech. Of all God’s creatures, only
Man has the ability to speak logically and use speak in a creative process to
communicate with others. Let us train ourselves in small incremental steps to
use this power wisely in our prayers and in our social interactions.